a draft of last beautiful by robert sloan...the link is
http://robinsloan.com/last-beautiful
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I rode my bike to the beach on the last of the beautiful days.
Timon had to lure me out of the house. As a rule I’m unimpressed by the sun, and I have this theory that beautiful days are totally overrated. We all go crazy when the clouds part and the ground shimmers. Everybody gets distracted and scrambles outside as if it’ll never be nice again.
I’m not cranky! I just have a deep faith in the future, you know? There are beautiful days behind us and beautiful days to come—so relax and play some video games.
But it turns out my faith was unfounded, because Saturday, March 27 was, in fact, the last beautiful day.
On Sunday, the sky over the city was gray-green. Monday was worse, and the week that followed was a cage of dark clouds that trailed curtains of cold rain. There was lightning. It went on like that, week after week, month after month, all across the city, the peninsula, and the headlands—the sun simply refused to shine. And today, about a million of us are still stuck living in a weather non sequitur.
Something fundamental has changed; something important is broken.
But I’m not just talking about the sky.
The thing that sucked about the last beautiful day was that I didn’t get to spend it with Kate Trudeau.
Back at the beginning I lied: it wasn’t Timon’s coaxing, exactly, that got me out of the house. Rather, it was the understanding that Timon is friends with Lacey Pell, and Lacey is friends with Kate Trudeau, and Lacey was definitely coming, so Kate Trudeau was maybe coming. I mean, they’re really good friends. She was almost definitely coming.
If this sounds ridiculous, it’s because it is. But I’m in a quasi-anti-relationship with Kate Trudeau, which means that we made out twice, hooked up once, got angry at each other 1.5 times, and were currently traveling through some sort of romantic netherworld. Don’t look back, Orpheus.
There’s a spot in Golden Gate Park where you’re cruising down the green-cosseted road and you make a sharp turn—there’s a windmill on your right—and suddenly, there’s the ocean, so big and bright it messes up the color balance of your eyes. It’s wide and white and waves are crashing and you can’t believe it’s been there all this time. And, especially if you are coasting towards the possibility of Kate Trudeau, it feels like the newest, biggest, greatest thing in the world. Like: wow, who invented this, and why didn’t I know ’til now?
But Kate Trudeau did not in fact come, so I spent the whole day pretending to be interested in Lacey’s new job and playing quarter-hearted frisbee with some dude named Chad. Really, I was barely there; my spirit was out canvassing other beaches, other streets.
Saturday, April 17, 2010
Sunday, April 11, 2010
home....
Broken pieces of yellow sun glinting bangles on the floor
A book of self deprecating poetry on the shelf
Dreams of grandeur wrapped in stained satin
Trust which gathers rust in the attic
Unclean looks stashed away in the bottom drawer
Laughter that made its escape as cerulean soap bubbles through the open window
Sorrow that is stored in barrels in the cellar
A patchwork quilt of emotions lies on the settee
An empty coffee cup with lipstick marks and a veiled sigh
A cesspit where conversations have run dry
Waiting that lies coiled over the threshold
A tarnished nameplate that adorns the closed door
Mind your step
Welcome home.
In Musing Mode is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 2.5 India License.
A book of self deprecating poetry on the shelf
Dreams of grandeur wrapped in stained satin
Trust which gathers rust in the attic
Unclean looks stashed away in the bottom drawer
Laughter that made its escape as cerulean soap bubbles through the open window
Sorrow that is stored in barrels in the cellar
A patchwork quilt of emotions lies on the settee
An empty coffee cup with lipstick marks and a veiled sigh
A cesspit where conversations have run dry
Waiting that lies coiled over the threshold
A tarnished nameplate that adorns the closed door
Mind your step
Welcome home.
In Musing Mode is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 2.5 India License.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Hmmm....pondering pondering...
Only after the last tree has been cut down.
Only after the last river has been poisoned.
Only after the last fish has been caught.
Only then will you find that
money cannot be eaten.
Prophecy of the Cree Native American Tribe
Only after the last river has been poisoned.
Only after the last fish has been caught.
Only then will you find that
money cannot be eaten.
Prophecy of the Cree Native American Tribe
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